Professional Wellness Counseling, PLLC.
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I was nineteen years old when I was diagnosed with FacioScapulaHumeral Muscular Dystrophy (FSHD). That was a long time ago and I’ve been living with it for many years. Living with a disability can be trying and difficult for many people. For me, I’ve been blessed and never wanted my disability to be the defining […]
I was nineteen years old when I was diagnosed with FacioScapulaHumeral Muscular Dystrophy (FSHD). That was a long time ago and I’ve been living with it for many years. Living with a disability can be trying and difficult for many people. For me, I’ve been blessed and never wanted my disability to be the defining characteristic of my life. For the most part, this has been true about me but as I get older my FSHD has asserted itself in unexpected ways. Perhaps you also have a disability as well. These are some of the many lessons from my FSHD.
We are all works in progress in many ways. However, my FSHD has taught that it and I, are a work in progress together. My disability develops and progresses. This means it looks and feels different at different stages. It means I need to realize there are going to change. Using my arms will be harder at a certain stage. Walking will be challenging at another stage. In short, adapting and accepting change is important.
If you have a physical disability like FSHD, it is going to affect your pace. It is going to take me longer to get ready to go somewhere. It is going to take longer to get dressed. I can’t be at the same pace that other people can. I knew a woman with a disability who was rushing to get to the phone and fell and got hurt. When you have a disability, you need to accept a slower pace of living and getting things done.
Yes, I know this is not a word. However, if my FSHD has taught me anything, it is I have to embrace my Me-ness. My Me-ness is the me that actually exists, not the one that exists in my mind. My Me-ness includes accepting what I actually am. Accepting me is one of the first steps in being friends with my FSHD
Everyone should try to eat and sleep well. However, it is particularly important for someone with a disability to have good wellness habits. Too much weight is not good for someone with a disability. Eating the wrong foods may also create complications. Having good sleep habits can also help to build a healthy life. I need to get enough sleep and go to bed and wake up at roughly the same time.
My FSHD doesn’t like patience. When you have a disability, patience is important. I need patience with myself and also others. Some people with disabilities depend on others. Being patient with people who care for them. Frustration is common for people with disabilities and their caregivers. Be patient.
Don’t neglect your mental and emotional health. People with disabilities and their caregivers are particularly susceptible to problems like anxiety and depression. I good therapist can help you to adust and cope.
These lessons from my FSHD have helped me in many situations. They have helped me to make adjustments as my disease has changed. They have helped me to cope with the uncertainties of having FSHD. Click here if to download the FSHD lessons infographic.
It’s almost time for thanksgiving. Are you ready for the same old thanksgiving? Maybe you’re a member of one of those families that don’t struggle, have no black sheep, and never raise their voices. Then there’s the rest of us. Wouldn’t you like this thanksgiving to be the best thanksgiving ever? Well, it can be. […]
It’s almost time for thanksgiving. Are you ready for the same old thanksgiving? Maybe you’re a member of one of those families that don’t struggle, have no black sheep, and never raise their voices. Then there’s the rest of us. Wouldn’t you like this thanksgiving to be the best thanksgiving ever? Well, it can be. Here are some suggestions on how.
In such a contentious election year, people are more divided than ever before. Talking politics is something many are not thankful for. Therefore, agreeing to steer clear of politics might be in everyone’s best interest.
For some, Thanksgiving is synonymous with overeating. This is not a good thing. Eat smaller portions. Save some for later. Don’t overdo it.
Perhaps this is the motto of a healthy person. As Americans, we’ve been trained to supersize. However, maybe in regards to Thanksgiving, less is more. Go small. Less food. Less people. More wellness. Living simply is one of the keys to wellness for some people.
Thanksgiving is a time to enjoy family. Admittedly, not everyone’s family is enjoyable. Some families are great. Others, not so much. Look for areas of common ground. Find and focus on those. Leave the rest.
Set healthy boundaries. Know when to say no. No to unwanted interactions, No to politics(yes, again). No to contentious conversations. Conversely, say yes to self-care.
A football or basketball team sometimes needs a time out to regroup. Sometimes we do too. And timeouts are not just for children. Take a time out if there is conflict and withdraw and take a break. Time outs are good if there are unwanted interactions or situations. You can use a timeout to be by yourself or do some solitary activity to redirect yourself.
For this to be the best thanksgiving ever, you have to do things in a different way. Click here for an article on developing habits of thanksgiving.
A few years ago my friend from graduate school was relating to me how her daughter, who had recently acquired a new job was struggling with anxiety. She went on to describe to me how she got a great new job bit that one of the requirements of the job was to pass a comprehensive […]
A few years ago my friend from graduate school was relating to me how her daughter, who had recently acquired a new job was struggling with anxiety. She went on to describe to me how she got a great new job bit that one of the requirements of the job was to pass a comprehensive competency test. It seems that her anxiety was a form of test/performance anxiety. I suggested that she teach her the mindful grounding exercise. I will describe it and give examples below. I’ll come back to the conclusion of this story later.
Before you begin doing the grounding exercise you may want to find a few minutes and a place to yourself to concentrate on being mindful. The first step in the mindful grounding exercise is to identify five things you can see. Some examples might be…
The second step is simply to identify four things you can feel with your sense of touch. Some examples of this are…
The third step is to identify three things you can hear. For some people, this requires being more mindful than they are used to simply being cluttered with noise. Examples of this step are…
At this stage, it can get a little dicey for some people. From here on out the exercise requires mindful concentration. Step four of the grounding exercise is to identify two things you smell. Examples of this are…
The final step to the grounding exercise is to identify one thing you can taste. Examples of this are…
Now back to my story from above. My friend taught her daughter the grounding exercise. In addition, she told her to do the exercise a few times right before she had to take the test again. She did it, and consequently, her anxiety was lower and she did great on the test. This is sometimes called the 1-2-3-4-5 exercise. And as you can see it’s not complicated at all. It’s just paying attention to your senses and that can have a dramatic impact on struggles like anxiety, stress, depression, and coping with difficult situations. This and other exercises can be found here.
Click here to download my Mindful Grounding Exercise Infographic
Practicing grounding exercises can have many benefits. Grounding exercises are a form of mindfulness practice. Research suggests grounding exercises can affect wellness and health in many areas including cognition and emotional health. And there is a myriad of different kinds of grounding exercises. So what are some of the benefits of practicing grounding? Below are […]
Practicing grounding exercises can have many benefits. Grounding exercises are a form of mindfulness practice. Research suggests grounding exercises can affect wellness and health in many areas including cognition and emotional health. And there is a myriad of different kinds of grounding exercises. So what are some of the benefits of practicing grounding? Below are several benefits of grounding
Grounding exercises focus on physical sensations. Focusing on things like what we see, hear, smell, etc. Grounding by observing one’s senses is useful because it helps to cope with unwanted thoughts and sensations. These types of exercises are often used with people who struggle with PTSD, mood disorders, stress, and in substance use treatment.
That’s when we get in our hot tub time machine(or Delorean) and travel to the past or the future. When we go to the past we think about painful things from our past and play them over and over in that youtube viewer that only exists in our mind. Or we go to the future and think about all the unknown. “Will I have enough for retirement?” or “Will I find a romantic partner?” Your brain can’t be in two places at the same time. You can’t practice grounding and also be in the past or the future.
Grounding exercises are helpful in reaching a more relaxed state. While grounding, our level of relaxation increases. Consequently, our ability to cope also increases. Research literature establishes grounding as an effective coping technique for traumatic and unwanted thoughts and emotions. Relaxation is a key solution to coping with the consequences of many mental health struggles.
In conclusion, grounding exercises are easy to learn to do. They help people who struggle with stress, depression, anxiety, and similar mental health struggles. Click here to learn a simple grounding exercise.
If you asked any of us a year ago what would life be like in 2020, it’s doubtful anyone would have guessed we’d be going through a global pandemic, replete with lockdowns and self-quarantining. At the beginning of the year, some families might have thought of being forced to stay home from work and school […]
If you asked any of us a year ago what would life be like in 2020, it’s doubtful anyone would have guessed we’d be going through a global pandemic, replete with lockdowns and self-quarantining. At the beginning of the year, some families might have thought of being forced to stay home from work and school would be a fun little vacation. But as the weeks and months have passed, we’ve all learned this has been anything but fun. Therefore, the family impact of COVID-19 has been dramatic.
But how is COVID affecting families? Well, it affects parents and kids and spouses a little differently.
Kids haven’t enjoyed the time off nearly as much as we all initially thought. Disruption to normal routines caused many teens and adolescents to feel anxiety. Add to this being away from their friends, and many young people are also feeling depressed.
Summer vacation for many this year wasn’t as fun as normal. Travel has been next to impossible for some families in certain states. Cancellations of sports events occurred. Boredom has set in for many kids, which has led to a lot of acting out and showing mood swings.
The pandemic has also negatively impacted those youths already suffering from a mental health issue. An example of this is those on the autism spectrum. For many of these kids, a disruption of routine combined with the cancellation of speech therapy sessions has stalled their progress and caused anxiety.
With some schools opening and some only offering online classes, life is still not back to normal and many kids are simply not able to deal with this crisis any longer.
Parents have, without question, been hit hard by the pandemic. With forced school closures, many parents have had to learn how to home school while also learn how to get used to the “new normal” of working from home.
As if that wasn’t enough, parents have also had to become mental health therapists, helping their children navigate through the fear, anxiety, and depression they are experiencing.
Quarantining and self-isolation have definitely impacted our familial and romantic relationships. When you are locked in a house with your family, things get chaotic and, well, everyone gets on each other’s nerves. Now forced to live on top of one another, and enduring financial hardships, worrying about health, and educating and organizing the children—just going grocery shopping can add a layer of stress.
Many couples may already have relationship issues under the surface. These couples may find the sudden and intense stress has brought these issues to the surface. This can be a turning point for many relationships. They may ask themselves “will this current crisis bring us closer or finally drive us apart?”
Without question, we are all living under an intense amount of stress. This stress is affecting us all in different ways. If you and your family aren’t able to handle the stress any longer, it’s important that you reach out and get some help from a family counselor. Most therapists are offering telehealth services, which means you can get the benefits of therapy right over the internet. IN conclusion, there are options for those struggling with the family impact of COVID-19.
If you’d like to explore treatment options, please reach out to me. I’d be more than happy to discuss how I may be able to help. To contact me click here.
SOURCES:
COVID-19 and the pandemic have affected many of us in unprecedented and unforeseen ways. Many pandemic lessons have been learned. The pandemic lockdown has caused people to be more isolated. It has created increases in mental health problems like anxiety and depression. It has also forced many to improvise on how to do work and […]
COVID-19 and the pandemic have affected many of us in unprecedented and unforeseen ways. Many pandemic lessons have been learned. The pandemic lockdown has caused people to be more isolated. It has created increases in mental health problems like anxiety and depression. It has also forced many to improvise on how to do work and family during this time.
The pandemic has caused our country and many other countries to adopt new and innovative ways of delivering services and working. An example of this is therapy. Many counselors have transitioned from office visits to telehealth therapy. Click here for information on our telehealth therapy. Unfortunately, these and many other changes have been forced upon us by demand.
One of the things that we can learn from the pandemic is that people are resilient. We have the ability to overcome challenging and unexpected situations. When we find ourselves in need of help, we can find a therapist for help. Additionally, there are other resources to support our resiliency. Most notable are the online support opportunities like Talkspace or other online helpline or services. The important thing to remember is that you are resilient and there are resources if you need help.
Another important pandemic lesson is the lesson of innovation. The pandemic has taught us we need to be creative in finding solutions to problems. For example, restaurants have created outside eating areas during the quarantine. Churches have also creatively adapted. Many churches are doing outdoor worship services, services in cars, and indoor services without music and social distanced. In short, many in many industries have had to employ creativity to carry out their work.
Closely related to creativity is the pandemic lesson of productivity. Many people have had their jobs and livelihoods affected by the pandemic. There are a couple of things that people have done to maintain productivity. For instance, many of those still working have been forced to do so from home. in addition. many workers have also been carrying out their work in new and creative ways. The use of services like ZOOM to stay connected to and collaborate with fellow employees is now commonplace.
If any of these pandemic lessons resonate with you and you are looking for solutions to your struggles, I am currently accepting new clients. Click here for more information.
https://www.newsweek.com/2020/06/05/mental-health-toll-coronavirus-could-rival-that-disease-itself-1506664.html
https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/355668
http://www.Talkspace.com
For many people, their religion is a big part of their life. Faith and our connection to God are how many of us get through life’s most difficult challenges. But in recent weeks and months, as the country and world have locked down due to the pandemic, it has been impossible for people to continue […]
For many people, their religion is a big part of their life. Faith and our connection to God are how many of us get through life’s most difficult challenges.
But in recent weeks and months, as the country and world have locked down due to the pandemic, it has been impossible for people to continue to worship at their church, mosque, or synagogue. This has caused many to not only feel isolated but also anxious and depressed.
Traditional therapy has been a means for people to deal with their depression and anxiety for decades. But religious therapy is a rather new offering and one that is helping many people during this, particularly challenging time.
While it may seem that religion and therapy are in direct contrast to each other, the truth is, faith and therapy should not be mutually exclusive. Prayers can be powerful tools for change and so can the mental tools offered by a therapist.
And while therapy will never replace a person’s religion, it can be a wonderful compliment to it, particularly to those people who are suffering right now due to the lockdowns.
Faith-based therapists are themselves religious and enjoy working with clients who share a strong faith in God. These therapists encourage clients to explore psychological issues against the backdrop of religion. The client’s faith is very much a part of the treatment plan and God is right there in the room with the client and therapist.
You have a couple of options when looking for a faith-based therapist near you: You can use an online therapy network such as Talkspace to find a faith-based therapist in your local area.
If you are someone that lives in a rural area or smaller community, and you have trouble finding a faith-based therapist near you, you can always choose online therapy. This means you would connect with a faith-based therapist via online chat.
Exploring your faith in therapy is a way of knowing yourself to the fullest extent. And that in turn only deepens your faith. If you are struggling during the pandemic because you’re not able to attend your local place of worship, consider giving religious therapy a try.
And, if you’re interested in exploring treatment, including online telehealth therapy, please get in touch with me!
SOURCES:
In a time of social distancing initiating and maintaining one’s physical and emotional wellness, being is a challenge. To continue to deliver effective mental health services, Professional Wellness Counseling offers Telehealth counseling. This type of service offers you the ability to receive mental health services using a computer or smartphone while maintaining the social distancing […]
In a time of social distancing initiating and maintaining one’s physical and emotional wellness, being is a challenge. To continue to deliver effective mental health services, Professional Wellness Counseling offers Telehealth counseling. This type of service offers you the ability to receive mental health services using a computer or smartphone while maintaining the social distancing required to keep yourself safe.
Advantages of Telehealth
Its more convenient
It can be done from anywhere
It can be done with technology that must people
It allows people to continue counseling and maintain social distancing
Please call Chris at 336-584-0050 or email at Chris@professionalwellnesscounseling.com for help with
Depression
Anxiety
Anger
Relationship Problems
Problems Coping with Isolation
Stress
In the United States, we have a Thanksgiving holiday. It’s a government-sponsored time to give gratitude for the things and people in our lives we are thankful for. But thankfulness is a mark of a healthy inner intellectual and emotional life. People who develop habits of thankfulness tend to be more people. So, why should we […]
In the United States, we have a Thanksgiving holiday. It’s a government-sponsored time to give gratitude for the things and people in our lives we are thankful for. But thankfulness is a mark of a healthy inner intellectual and emotional life. People who develop habits of thankfulness tend to be more people. So, why should we develop habits of thanksgiving?
Developing habits of gratitude is a staple in substance use and recovery counseling programs. Participants of such programs learn to do a daily list of things they are grateful for. This and other similar habits enable them to center themselves. Centering ourselves on the things in our lives that are good is a positive habit. It’s easy to focus on the chaos in our lives. Therefore, developing habits of thanksgiving keeps us centered.
When we are thankful, we are open to new things. Thankfulness helps us to become aware of the ways that we have been blessed. As we develop a sense of gratitude for our lives we are more open about future possibilities. Because of this, thankfulness opens new doors in our lives. This openness can lead to new relationships and opportunities for growth.
There are a variety of positive effects that thankfulness can have on our health. One of these is the benefits a habit of gratitude has on physical health. Research suggests more emotionally balanced people are thankful. This balance leads to a more healthy physical life. According to Psychotherapist Amy Morin people who are thankful are more proactive about their health. As a result, they take steps toward being more physically healthy.
Developing habits of daily gratitude can lead to greater inner discipline. Also, it leads to increased emotional and physical health. Above all, we stay centered and live in the moment. When we develop habits of thankfulness.
A few years ago I was speaking at a church. I shared a message on forgiveness. After the service, a lady came up to me and said: “It was a great sermon, but you don’t know what ‘i’ve been through.” Which was true. I didn’t. Forgiveness is hard. Forgiveness is the core issue of the […]
A few years ago I was speaking at a church. I shared a message on forgiveness. After the service, a lady came up to me and said: “It was a great sermon, but you don’t know what ‘i’ve been through.” Which was true. I didn’t. Forgiveness is hard. Forgiveness is the core issue of the Christian faith. Clearly, the message of the cross is that Jesus sacrificed Himself on the cross to take away the sins of the humanity. As a counselor, one of the things that is clear to me is that forgiveness is not only an important issue for people who are Christians, but it is equally important for those who want to be healthy. However, there are many ideas about forgiveness that are simply untrue. Below are several myths about forgiveness.
This is my favorite forgiveness myth. We have all heard it before. Forgiving is forgetting and if haven’t forgotten, then you haven’t forgiven. This is simply untrue. And it may be true that human beings are not capable of forgetting. It is true that Isaiah 43:25 says: “I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.” God is capable of not remembering but it is never suggested that human beings are capable of this. And the Bible never suggests a correlation between forgiving and forgetting. However, it is possible that with a forgiving heart, difficult memories occupy a less prominent place in our thinking.
Well, yes and no. Yes, you’ve been given free will and no one can take that away. You can’t be forced to do anything including to forgive. In that way it is optional. However, on the other hand, forgiveness is expected for the Christian. In Matthew 6:15 Jesus plainly said: “if you do not forgive others, God will not forgive you.” Again in Matthew 18, Jesus tells the parable of the ungrateful servant. At the conclusion of the parable, the servant is punished. Jesus then offers these words of commentary “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.” We can conclude from these passages that Jesus expects Christians to forgive others.
There are many people who feel this way. They have been hurt and feel dumped on. In their mind, forgiving others means giving abusive, unpleasant people an opportunity to dump on them again. This is not at all the message of the Bible about forgiveness. There is a difference between forgiving others who hurt you and continuing to trust them. It is a healthy thing to have boundaries. Proverbs 25:17 says “Let your foot be seldom in your neighbor’s house, lest he has his fill of you and hates you.” Proverbs 22:24 says “Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man.” These passages suggest having healthy boundaries. We can forgive others while at the same time having healthy boundaries. You can forgive and not be a doormat.
It does seem that forgiveness is selfless on the surface. However, I suggest that real reason you should forgive is a selfish one. Forgiving restores relationships. But the reason you should forgive is for what it does for you. When you forgive, it self-circuits bitterness. Ephesians 4:31-32 says: “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” In this passage, there is a contrast between bitterness and forgiveness. The best reason to forgive is the impact it has on you. Forgiveness is good for the person who does the forgiving. So forgive, But do it because of what it does for you a follower of Jesus.
Forgiveness is a core issue for Christians. It is important not only for us to be forgiven by God, but that we forgive others as well. Satan has used many strategies that are designed to minimize the importance of forgiveness. He has been effetive at creating myths about forgiveness. So, cultivate a forgiving heart as you live the Christian life.
